Happy Halloween! Um, I Think You’re Doing It Wrong

Halloween is my favorite holiday. I used to spend weeks decorating. Carving pumpkins, putting little tombstones in the yard, even setting up fake skeletons on the porch with dusters in hand, cleaning all the fake cobwebs. Nowadays I spend most of my time helping my clients decorate. Granted they don’t have the same vision as me. Each one has their own unique way of doing … Continue reading Happy Halloween! Um, I Think You’re Doing It Wrong

The Cleaning Lady is Not Your Friend

There is a precarious dynamic involved in a Cleaning Lady / Client relationship. I provide a service for you, and you pay me. That’s what it’s supposed to be. But when you have clients for as many years as I do, the relationship gets blurred. Not for me, but for many of my clients. Before we begin, it goes without saying to never work for … Continue reading The Cleaning Lady is Not Your Friend

DOs and DON’Ts of Being a Hurricane Guest in Someone Else’s House

This post will be a little different from the rest of my cleaning and client shenanigans. While I try to stay completely anonymous, I will say I am in one of the states affected by Hurricane Dorian. We got very lucky with only minor damage and a few days without power. The Bahamas, on the other hand, will take months, if not years to fully … Continue reading DOs and DON’Ts of Being a Hurricane Guest in Someone Else’s House

The Cleaning Lady Knows All Your Secrets

As a cleaning lady, I have to be in every nook and cranny of your house, and by extension, every nook and cranny of your life. That’s why it’s important to find someone who values discretion and confidentiality. But if you don’t want me to find something, put it away. And I’m not talking about under the bed where you hide your poopy pants. I … Continue reading The Cleaning Lady Knows All Your Secrets

Cleaning Lady/Client Confidentiality

Or as I like to call it, “No ma’am,” “No sir” and “Fine” I realize the title of this post is a bit hypocritical, considering I write a blog about my clients, but I post anonymously and change the names of my subjects. And I highly doubt any of my many followers know any of these people, so I’m probably safe for now. Until the … Continue reading Cleaning Lady/Client Confidentiality

Spring Yard Work Time

In addition to cleaning the Bird Lady’s house and decking her halls with ungodly amounts of Christmas decorations, I also take care of her small back yard and flower beds in the front. This is not a job responsibility I look forward to, mostly because she refuses to buy the right equipment, like yard equipment. So come Spring, she hands me her kitchen scissors and … Continue reading Spring Yard Work Time

Two tea pots boiling on one gas burner

If People Weren’t Complete Trainwrecks, I’d Be Out of a Cleaning Job

I have ten clients on my roaster at the moment.  It’s a good number for me as I work by, and for, myself.  Everyone keeps telling me to hire some people and grow my business into some cleaning empire, scrubbing the world of filth and coffee stains, but I’m happy where I am.  And my clients are a handful enough. All my clients vary in … Continue reading If People Weren’t Complete Trainwrecks, I’d Be Out of a Cleaning Job

Baby crawling on floor yelling in front of crib

Why Your Cleaning Lady Is Not Your Babysitter

I hate the word maid.  I’ve never considered myself one, with the word evoking images of black and white clad servants taking coats at the door or serving tea to rich, blue-hairs barking orders at them.  So I just call myself a cleaning lady.  I come into your house once a week or every two weeks and clean (organizational jobs aside).  That’s about it.  I … Continue reading Why Your Cleaning Lady Is Not Your Babysitter

Christmas and the Bird Lady

Today I went to the Bird Lady’s house. I call her the Bird Lady, not because she has a bunch of birds in cages, but because she spends the majority of her days in her sunroom smoking cigarettes and identifying all the birds who fly into her yard.  She is an elderly woman, in her mid-seventies, but still gets around surprisingly well and always has … Continue reading Christmas and the Bird Lady

Three bananas in metal basket

Fifty Shades of Grey Just Got Cleaner

Some years back, I got a phone call from a couple.  I will henceforth refer to them as Mr. and Mrs. Grey (which will become absurdly apparent shortly).  I was still advertising on Craigslist at the time. “Cleaning and Organizational Specialist” was my title and “Discretion” was my mantra.  They took that to heart and decided to give me a call. Mrs. Grey greeted me … Continue reading Fifty Shades of Grey Just Got Cleaner