How My Little Train Wrecks Decorate For Christmas
house cleaning humor

How My Little Train Wrecks Decorate For Christmas

I hope everyone had a wonderful and safe Thanksgiving. Hopefully your hearts and bellies were full, so much so that you had to break out the “stretchy” pants you put away after your diet. For the Cleaning Lady clan, it was a small, outdoor affair in the country. Luckily the weather was overly cooperative with…

4 Funny Thanksgiving Commercials To Lift Your Spirits
house cleaning humor

4 Funny Thanksgiving Commercials To Lift Your Spirits

With Thanksgiving next week and a pandemic in full swing, the holidays this year seem a bit uncertain for many. You may have cancelled that trip to Gramma’s house and are just having Turkey Day with your immediate family (I’m really going to miss Uncle Bob’s inappropriate war stories about that brothel in Vietnam). So…

Does Your Cleaning Person Need Your Help?
Cleaning Service Tips | House Cleaning Tips

Does Your Cleaning Person Need Your Help?

All of my clients look forward to their cleaning day. And understandably so. Their house gets magically cleaned by little cleaning fairies while they are not home. Or that’s how it should ideally work. But not with my clients. They like to stay home and help clean. It’s annoying, and detrimental. But there’s not much…

How To Not Kill (or Maim) Your Cleaning Person
Cleaning Service Tips | House Cleaning Tips

How To Not Kill (or Maim) Your Cleaning Person

Some people don’t see cleaning houses as a dangerous profession. It’s certainly not up there with Alaskan crabbing or logging. But house cleaners can run into some dangerous situations. And many of them can be avoided by communication from the client. So I’d like to give homeowners a few tips on how not to kill…

These 5 Spooky Cleaning Commercials Will Make Your Day
house cleaning humor

These 5 Spooky Cleaning Commercials Will Make Your Day

Halloween is that time of year when I like to dust off the old scary movie classics from my youth and remember that I used to be scared by that mechanical zombie guy whose arms couldn’t move quite right. Nowadays, it’s my clients who are downright scary. It’s also the time when some companies get…

Masks: The Must-Have 2020 Fashion Accessory
COVID stories | house cleaning humor

Masks: The Must-Have 2020 Fashion Accessory

No mask? That’s so 2019. Since Covid-19 has changed everything about life this year, I’d like to talk about the most prominent and ubiquitous accessory that everyone must have, literally. The ever-present mask. Like humans tend to do, we were not satisfied with the boring and institutional blue or white mask. Creativity and humor took…

The Cat Lady
house cleaning humor

The Cat Lady

Many years ago, when I was first starting out, I cleaned a house for a self-proclaimed “Cat Lady”. She rescued homeless cats or saved them from shelters. Which I’m cool with. I love cats. I’ve had a few over the years, and thank gooodness I’m not allergic. Because when I started with her, she had…

A Very Train Wreck Valentine’s Day
house cleaning humor

A Very Train Wreck Valentine’s Day

As with most holidays, each of my client’s celebrate Valentine’s Day a little differently. Some are young and single, some divorced, some widowed, and some married. So this week has been spent helping some of my little trainwrecks prepare for their special day. Coincidentally, I came across this very illuminating map which proves that maybe…

Happy Halloween! Um, I Think You’re Doing It Wrong
house cleaning humor

Happy Halloween! Um, I Think You’re Doing It Wrong

Halloween is my favorite holiday. I used to spend weeks decorating. Carving pumpkins, putting little tombstones in the yard, even setting up fake skeletons on the porch with dusters in hand, cleaning all the fake cobwebs. Nowadays I spend most of my time helping my clients decorate. Granted they don’t have the same vision as…

Why You Need a Ladder to Clean a Bachelor Pad
house cleaning humor

Why You Need a Ladder to Clean a Bachelor Pad

Today I clean the “BroZone.” It is the bachelor pad of a my youngest client, a 25-year-old weightlifter and personal trainer. I did not give his apartment this hideous name. He did, along with some of his other meathead buddies during an all-night brainstorming session fueled by Budweiser and protein shakes. They were so proud…

If People Weren’t Complete Train Wrecks, I’d Be Out of a Cleaning Job
house cleaning humor

If People Weren’t Complete Train Wrecks, I’d Be Out of a Cleaning Job

I have ten clients on my roaster at the moment.  It’s a good number for me as I work by, and for, myself. Everyone keeps telling me to hire some people and grow my business into some cleaning empire, scrubbing the world of filth and coffee stains, but I’m happy where I am. And my…

Why Your Cleaning Lady Is Not Your Babysitter
house cleaning humor | Cleaning Service Tips

Why Your Cleaning Lady Is Not Your Babysitter

I hate the word maid.  I’ve never considered myself one, with the word evoking images of black and white clad servants taking coats at the door or serving tea to rich, blue-hairs barking orders at them.  So I just call myself a cleaning lady.  I come into your house once a week or every two…

Does This Cleaning Job Come With a Hazmat Suit?
house cleaning humor

Does This Cleaning Job Come With a Hazmat Suit?

Today, I’m cleaning Midge’s house.  She is one of my favorite clients but also the one I need insurance for, or a Hazmat suit. Midge is a short, sweet, 60-something divorcee living alone in a spacious condo in a gated community.  She also has a penchant for vodka and covering sharp objects with towels. Every…